While Shipman and Kay have very valid points of which I've experienced in my own life, I'd have to side more with Valenti's observations as, I believe Professor Van Cleaf would agree.
It is clear that Shipman and Kay have done extensive research on the subject, however, they have focused more on only a woman's inner feelings (or in this case self-confidence) rather than how society may have been influential on their sense of inadequacy.
For a fairly confident individual, yes, I've considered myself a fraud when others praise me for a job well done. Yes, I've put blame on myself for situations completely out of my control. And yes, I've been bewildered at times as to why people seek me out for advice on things I am no expert on. Is it a self-confidence issue? Maybe, but where does this all stem from? Some may have had a rough upbringing or traumatic incidents that have influenced their lives and whole sense of being. For instance, I had a very needy friend in my life who didn't get hugged much when she was younger. In addition she wasn't praised and encouraged as she should have been. For example, if she helped her dad wash the car, instead of praising her for a job well done, he'd say, "don't worry honey, I'll go back over it and get what you missed." Many of my other friends would say to me "when you meet her, she seems like she's saying 'it's so nice to meet you, but why don't you like me.'" While her parents were certainly lovely people and loved their daughter very much, they didn't praise their kids enough or exhibit affection as needed. This resulted in very low self-esteem, fear of abandonment and a neediness that was intense. Later on she was also afraid to move ahead in her professional life, probably making her feel even worse about herself. I'm sure her parents were brought up the same way which could be attributed to Structural Functional Theory.
I, on the other hand had very loving, affectionate parents who praised me continuously except for one thing. I have been heavy for much of my life and the one thing that I heard most was, your face is so pretty, if only you were thinner you could, you would... There can be any number of endings to that sentence, just fill in the blank and you will get the idea.
Where does everyone get this idea of what a woman should be, how she should look, what she can do? From society and their screwed up sense of misguided entitlement for men.
That's not to say that there aren't men that have self-confidence issues. They may just deal with them differently than a woman or strategically hide those feelings from their adoring public.
The bottom line is that most self-confidence issues come from what society tells us to believe and the fact that as a society many are completely gullible and clueless and simply adopt the roles we are told to buy into about what role each gender should play, be or do in life. Unfortunately, societies as a whole would have to become more adaptable and accepting to a change in gender role mentality in order to turn this mindset around. One day an alternate reality version of today's society could become a true reality but the time and effort it would take is a daunting task that the world may never be ready for.
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